People cheat. They juggle multiple lovers. They have serial relationships. They watch porn. You could chalk it up to the spectrum of sexual appetites, destructive as some may be. Or you could check yourself into rehab for sexual addiction. That’s how it went for Terrie, a then-married Arkansas schoolteacher with three kids. What began as giddy email flirtations with her former teacher turned into an affair, and when that ended, she had another affair, and then another, with men she met online.
Over six years, Terrie says she had yearlong affairs with six men, often securing the next before letting go of the one before. “I was just possessed, I guess, with this drive to keep having that giddy vibe,” said Terrie, now 46 and living in Memphis, Tenn., who asked that her last name not be published. (more…)
Sex addiction and love addiction: Are they the same thing or entirely different? Depends on who you ask. Those who recognize both as legitimate process addictions , similar to compulsive gambling or shopping, (and we can have a discussion about the nature of addiction another time) tend to put the two at odds: sex addiction versus love addiction. Love addicts are emotionally fragile victims (usually female), forever clutching at the ankles of love avoidant (male) sex addicts, those lying, manipulative jerks. This predator/victim paradigm is neat, clean and easy to digest … and it misses the entire pathology of the addiction. (more…)
With the Tiger Woods scandal officially behind us, the Daily Beast looks into our nation’s sex addiction epidemic—which now afflicts more than 9 million people and employs some 1,500 sex therapists. “Where it used to be 40- to 50-year-old men seeking treatment, now there are more females, adolescents, and senior citizens,” says one expert. Whether it’s online porn or a wild merry-go-round of sexual partners, millions of Americans are pursuing sex to sugar-coat long-suppressed emotional needs. Aided by the Internet and high-tech GPS gadgets, they can satisfy their needs faster than ever before. (more…)
You might think that the awful weather, the falling leaves, and the jack o’lantern decorations on storefront windows mean that October is drawing to a close. But if you thought that, you’d be wrong—what’s actually ending is Queer Awareness Month at Columbia. By this time of year, the queer-centric events schedule has pretty much run its course: Movies have been watched, talks have been talked, raves have been raved, and free food has been pillaged. All of it is fabulous, but pretty run-of-the-mill, as Columbia happenings go.
Except that it’s not. Because this is happening in New York City, where the AIDS crisis killed thousands of people and the Stonewall riots burst through walls of silence, where gay marriage is currently a legal institution. This is happening at Columbia, where countless generations of young people have had their first real introductions to sex and love and all the things that screw those things up. (more…)
Have you ever been awoken in the dead of night by an acute stabbing sensation, only to realize your unconscious partner was having sex with you? There’s actually a word for that, and no, it’s not sleepscrewing — but it’s almost as dumb! It’s called “sexsomnia,” a term coined by Dr. Colin Shapiro in 2003 to describe “people who engage in sexual acts while they are asleep, such as masturbation, fondling, sexual intercourse and actions that would be sexual assault or rape were the sufferer conscious.”
Ryan Harris is a raging sexsomniac. His wife, Dee Harris, tells The Sun that their 16-month-old baby boy was conceived during one of his more vigorous episodes. (more…)
Life energy and sexual energy are intertwined—you could say joined at the hip. Your sexuality is your passion print, which is as unique as a fingerprint. You can’t conceal or reveal it with the kind of clothes you wear either, whether it’s revealing blouses or sweats. You express your passion print by the way you move, the scent you emit, how you speak with your eyes, part your lips and breathe. However, constant stress, work, household responsibilities, overzealous parenting, an improper diet, a sedentary lifestyle, poor sleeping habits, cardiovascular disease and diabetes will put an end to feeling sexy everyday and every night, plain and simple.
No one can live a stress-free life. Be aware that stress is a cumulative process—small daily stressors add up and tend to overwhelm. Consequently, when you get out of balance both physically and emotionally, sex falls by the wayside. Are you angry at your spouse? At yourself? Do you feel anxious about having sex? The most efficient way to shed stress hormones and reduce anxiety is by exercising: move it out of the body and the mind. (more…)
Sex toys promote good health! There is some interesting and well-documented health benefits associated with the use of sex toys.
Having an orgasm releases stress and tension, and is a great way to start the day or to help you have an enjoyable sleep. Dealing with sexual frustration will allow a person to deal with all the other issues that they have to contend with. At the same time, while they are separated from a partner, or have no current partner, they can be satisfied without having to risk cheating.
During menopause, most women experience some thinning of the vaginal wall. Studies indicate that the regular use of a dildo can help maintain vaginal tone.
Women who have trouble reaching orgasm can also benefit from the use of sex toys. Many leading experts on the subject recommend the use of a vibrator to help overcome orgasmic difficulty. (more…)